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Top Banana

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Top Banana
Top Banana.jpg
WORST GRAPHICS EVER.
Genre(s): 2D action platformer
Platform(s): Acorn Archimedes
Commodore Amiga
Atari ST
Commodore CDTV
Release: 1991 (computer systems)
1992 (CDTV)
Developer(s): Miles Visman
Publisher(s): Hex

Top Banana (Urban Chaos on the Commodore CDTV) is an environmentally-themed platform game produced by Hex and Psycore for the Acorn Archimedes in 1991 and ported to the Commodore Amiga and Atari ST in 1992.

Plot

KT is on a mission in a game called Top Banana to save Earth from ecological disaster caused by man's greed and stupidity.

Why It Sucks

  1. A strange and psychedelic FMV video plays at startup that makes no sense and can cause seizures. For some reason the sentence "Iron technology" is said over and over again during the FMV.
  2. Absolutely horrendous, ugly, and terrible graphics. The graphics are so ugly, they look like the game has been corrupted using a ROM corruptor and it looks like a college student was done in two weeks with terrible results, and can cause eye strain and even seizures. The Amiga and Atari ST ports further downgrade the graphics of the game and make the color palette worse. Also, there are collectible sweet food items, backgrounds and the enemies in the game, however, due to the ugly graphics, they look distorted and have a poor and hard on the eyes color palette. There's a reason why the Wikipedia article for this game says KT travels through psychedelic levels.
  3. In world four, the final world of the game, the game inverts all of the colors on screen when KT is in a certain area of a certain level, causing the game to have frame rate issues and slow down as a result.
  4. Creepy and nonsensical sounds are played for most actions in the Archimedes and Amiga versions, for example a metal clanking noise is played when KT jumps, a deep man voice is played when KT collects a food item, and a strange musical sound is played when KT takes damage. The background music does not help either, since it is creepy too.
  5. The designs of the enemies and the protagonist are ugly, grotesque, and deceptive, being the worst offender is KT, the playable heroine looks significantly different in game than on the box art and the splash screen of the game. On the box art she looks like a tan cartoon kid with a green hat, red shirt and shoes, blue pants, and black hair. In the game her face is egg shaped and has a more whitish color, has red blushes, and she hatless and red pants.
  6. Gameplay is a rip-off of Rainbow Islands, though it at least plays okay if you can get past the psychedelic and hard to look at design of the levels.
  7. Convoluted gameplay elements. There is a pickup-looking item that must be shot to make it double in size before it can be safely collected without damaging KT.
  8. Annoyingly, KT will be knocked down off the floor she is on when she takes damage during invincibility.
  9. No extra lives or continues. If you die once, you have to start the game from the beginning all over again.

Redeeming Qualities

  1. The controls are responsive and fluid, For example, if KT jumps, she will respond very quickly to press the button and also if you collect a lot of hearts with all the colors many times, surprisingly she jumps higher, even for a platform game.
  2. The sprites can be edited and replaced with more eye-pleasing graphics on the computer versions.
  3. The music video showing some gameplay footage has decent music.

Videos

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