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Surf Ninjas

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Surf Ninjas
Amiga surf ninjas.jpg
"Motosurf!" - Iggy
Genre(s): Beat em up
Platform(s): Amiga CD32
Release: 1993
Developer(s): Flair Software
Publisher(s): Flair Interactive

Surf Ninjas is a beat em up developed and published by Flair Software exclusively for the Amiga CD32 and released in 1993, it is supposedly based on the movie of the same name.

Why It Can't Surf

  1. The game has nothing to do with the movie, as said by AVGN it was probably a generic beat-em-up on Flair's hard drive just labeled Surf Ninjas in the last minute.
  2. Painfully boring gameplay, the only thing you do in the entire game is just gathering objects for NPCs.
  3. The options menu has only option to enable sounds and music, but you can either enable only sound effects or music, which is disappointing if you want to enable both of them.
  4. The combat is dreadful and even worse, you can just skip it entirely, nothing stops you.
  5. Only one enemy in the entire game, there aren't even bosses. This can be familiar to Batman Forever, as the enemies in Batman Forever are basically the same, while most of them being just recolors of the original ones.
  6. The game is only three levels and after that, the game just ends. The amount of levels is just like in the Game Boy Advance port of Marble Madness, as it also has 3 levels that can be beaten in less than 5 minutes.
  7. Lackluster text-based ending.
  8. Confusing navigation.
  9. Super short it can be beaten in 20 minutes if you ignore fights with enemies.
  10. Jumping hurts you. This is extremely weird and confusing, like if you would actually hit something invincible in the air that causes damage to your character, despite there's nothing in the air.
  11. In the game, you can rip out the hearts of your enemy by ducking and punching, and also stab enemies with a knife. All of these never happens in the movie. This shows that the game has poor grasp of the source material.
    • In one of the level where you're inside the restaurant, there is a painting of nude woman hanging on the wall, which is inappropriate.
  12. You die when the game feels like it, even if you still have some HP left, like if it was actually a bug that Flair refused to fix. This is just confusing, especially for a 1993 game.
  13. Only two tracks of music in the entire game. This is like if the composers were too lazy to compose more of the music for this game, so they only composed two of them, instead of three or more.
  14. Like most games on the CD32, up is jump, just like in Batman Forever on SNES and Genesis.
  15. You can only choose to hear sound effects or music.
    • This is not the only Amiga game to have this problem. Amiga computers (including the CD32) only have 4 audio channels, therefore it's impossible for some Amiga games to have both sound effects and music to play at the same time.
  16. Some noticeable bugs and glitches, when you stab an enemy with a knife once they fall, you can end up stabbing them even more.
  17. The main protagonist looks like he's not from the movie at all. This can confuse people into thinking if it's Ernie Reyes Jr. or Rob Schneider, as both Ernie Reyes Jr. and Rob Schneider were actors of the movie.

Videos

AVGN Enraged.jpg "What were they thinking?"
The Shit Scale
Games that are debatably bad High level of shit contamination The very high category The severe zone Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde Major code red
👆
This game/console belongs to the "Very High Category" category of the AVGN's Shit Scale.

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