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Milon's Secret Castle

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Milon's Secret Castle
Milon's Secret Castle cover.jpg
"Milon's Secret Castle... more like Milon's SHITTY ASSHOLE!!!"
— The Angry Video Game Nerd
Genre(s): Action
Puzzle
Platform(s): Nintendo Entertainment System
Game Boy
PlayStation Broadband Navigator
Game Boy Advance
Release: 1986
Developer(s): Hudson Soft
Publisher(s): Hudson Soft
Country: Japan
Series: Milon
Successor: DoReMi Fantasy: Milon no DokiDoki Daibouken

Milon's Secret Castle, known in Japan as Meikyū Kumikyoku: Miron no Daibōken (迷宮組曲 ミロンの大冒険 lit. "The Maze Suite: Milon's Great Adventure"), is a 1986 action-adventure game released by Hudson Soft for the Nintendo Famicom (Japan) on November 13, 1986 and for the Nintendo Entertainment System r(North America) in September 1988. Despite the game's poor quality, it sold over four million units in Japan.

Why It Sucks

  1. Any time you start the game, you don't start with full health.
  2. Very cryptic and confusing puzzles. The Angry Video Game Nerd had to use Nintendo Power magazine just to get past the first area.
  3. There are no continues or extra lives. There is, however, a continue code: On the main menu, hold left and hit start. However, you need to obtain the orb from the first boss in order to do this code.
  4. Slippery controls. Milon can sometimes stop on a time, other times he doesn't.
  5. You don't have temporary invincibility if an enemy, environmental hazard or projectile injures you. Any jumping enemy can juggle you to death if you're not careful.
  6. All of the bosses, except Marahito, have the same attack pattern.
  7. Your main weapon is bubbles, which made the AVGN think this game was for little girls. Also, the bubbles can only be fired diagonally, making it difficult to hit enemies. However, the bubbles can be upgraded to a fireball later in the game.
  8. Anytime you reach the door at the top or end of the room, it sends you back outside the castle.
  9. Hit boxes for the boss characters were small and it only targets the head to hurt them. The bosses had fast projectile that was hard to dodge on time.
  10. If you stay idle outside the castle for too long, lightning will begin to strike which can damage the player. Fortunately, there's a pause button.

Redeeming Qualities

  1. The music is at least quite decent.
  2. The graphics are also good for a late 1986 NES game.
  3. The Game Boy port managed to fix quite a bit of flaw in the game: a password feature, more music variety, slight temporary invincibility after getting hit, and being able to continue after a game over without a code. While you still need to beat the first boss to get passwords after a game over, it's an improvement from how it was originally handled.

Trivia

AVGN Enraged.jpg "What were they thinking?"
The Shit Scale
Games that are debatably bad High level of shit contamination The very high category The severe zone Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde Major code red
👆
This game/console belongs to the "High Level of Shit Contamination" category of the AVGN's Shit Scale.
  • Despite the negative feedback, the game somehow made it onto the Wii and 3DS Virtual Console.

Videos

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