Allistayrian's first page ever

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AllistayrianCode yellow

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Mighty Bland Shovelware(d) '06: Crossroads & Showdown 76 - Fallout Forces: Rise of Jake Conway: Over the Road Racing 64 is a 1999 platform game developed by Sonic Team and published by Sega for the Sega Saturn, PlayStation, and Microsoft Windows.

Plot

You play as a boy named Leo, who is a fucking cunt and ungrateful dick who later fucks up to a circus with a clown named Bland who introduces him to the world of Shovelware(d).

Gameplay

You walk and jump.

Why It Fucking Sucks

  1. Toilet humor
  2. Bad controls
  3. Shitty graphics
  4. This game exists
  5. The game title is hilariously bad
  6. The gameplay is non-existent
  7. The very fact that it was created by Sonic Team, instead of Artoon
  8. The very fact that it was published by Sega, instead of SquareSoft
  9. It's overpriced at 13489 dollars
  10. Fucking terrible collision detection in the same level of Big Motherfucking Rigs
  11. RareWare did not work on it, which guarantees qualitatively similar to Bubsy 3D
  12. Unlike Mario who died on March 31, 2021, this still exists
  13. This is a certified bruh moment

Redeeming Goddamn Qualities

  1. 2 + 2 = 4
  2. The mere fact that I am the creator of this blog
  3. I had butter for breakfast today without bread
  4. Even Todd Howard hates this garbage

Reception

It received 0/100 on Metacritic

Trivia

  • Seriously, I am the creator of this page

Videos

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Comments


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Allistayrian

13 days ago
Score 4
This page is still better than many non-existent FANDOM era pages.
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TheShinyLucarioMaster

13 days ago
Score 5
Best page ever 10/10. If the game still exists, was it ported multiple times?
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Allistayrian

13 days ago
Score 4
Yes, for the Atari 2600
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ThePCGamer

10 days ago
Score 3
Lol what is this? XD
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Allistayrian

10 days ago
Score 3
The greatest and most detailed FANDOM era page!
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HinD

9 days ago
Score 2
& Knuckles.
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TakeASoda

9 days ago
Score 1
Allistayrian, please help me, I have this feeling of dying inside and laughing to death by reading this beautiful page. xD
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Code yellow

6 days ago
Score 0
lol

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