Blog:Slide Your Way to Victory (awful page, don't read it)

Note: This game is fake, this page was only intended for comedic purporses, please don't vandalize.

"This game sucks."

- Angry Video Game Nerd

Slide Your Way to Victory is a 2021 platforming and sandbox released for the PC, PlayStation 4, PlayStation 5, Xbox One, Xbox Series X/S and Nintendo Switch. It was developed by HawkCry Studios and published by their respective company, Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo. The game focuses on Alvaro, the admin of Qualipedia, hunting for the notorious Auf Wiedersehen Petrovic trophy while DarkViperAU (The crazy runner and secret hunter) also tries to help Alvaro to collect his trophy, the other admins in Qualitipedia are also in process.

Plot
It begins in the events of the closure of the PS3/Xbox 360 servers of GTA Online, when Alvaro saw that, he starts to hunt the notorious Auf Wiedersehen Petrovic trophy under its head, during his adventure, he met DarkViperAU, a really skilled and long-time player of GTA V, his adventures still goes on until his goal.

Why It Slides Your Way To Disaster

 * 1) This pretty jerkass title, who invented?!
 * 2) *Why it's called "Slide Your Way to Victory"? More like Slide Yourself to Your Ass!
 * 3) This game has one of the worst graphics in any existence, it looks like Minecraft but three generations prior.
 * 4) Who the hell uses SHIFT^ to jump?!
 * 5) You need one the most powerful PCs in existence, not even Alvaro's gaming PC can run!
 * 6) *About the requirements, this blatantly jaw-dropping, you need:
 * 7) **An AMD Ryzen 15 7000.
 * 8) **An GeForce RTXS 1090 (48GB VRAM).
 * 9) **128GB of RAM.
 * 10) When DarkViperAU becomes your partner, he runs too fast, that he falls off cliffs many times.
 * 11) Awful score of the game's soundtrack, the music it's just a bunch of "Dings", "Dongs" and "Puffs".
 * 12) *Believe or not, it was composed by the same composer of Crazy Bus, there's no dawn way to imagine that.
 * 13) The game has a very stupid and uninspired story, seriously, who wanna find some useless bullcrap trophy that worths barely nothing, but a shitty bronze?
 * 14) GOD, THE CHARACTERS NEVER SHUT THE FUCK UP. They litterally say one-liners every 5 seconds.
 * 15) The world is bland and boring as hell, no NPCs are seen in existence, despite having many large cities.
 * 16) *The main problem, is that the world map design were made by chimps instead of AlvaroNovaes-BR (who have the most talent of map design), the CEO of HawkCry Studios confirmed that because the difficult support income from their headquarters, instead of announcing the game to get more attention.
 * 17) The movement is really stiff and hard to go around, the physics mommentum is really weak, worse than in GTA V and Sonic 4.
 * 18) Difficulty cranks up to utter pain, having many frustating moments and bullshit handcapping, like this level right here and also this one, this caused TENSE1983 to break his keyboard with rage.
 * 19) The bosses are a massive joke, they do litterally nothing, but just look at you.
 * 20) Very pissful performance, the console versions lags as shit to 15 FPS, while the PC version is very hard just to run over 40 FPS.
 * 21) The cover is just lazy and amateur, nothing a incredibly rushed concept made on Microsoft Paint.
 * 22) This game costs 60$, for a game this low, this game should deserve to the deep Steam shovelware, despite running on expensive and high quality platforms, that's enough for all the stupid crap they made!

Redeeming Qualities

 * 1) The multiplayer is enjoyably fun unlike other modern games, the multiplayer has many stuff and featured, but it's not constantly focused.
 * 2) The game has no microtransactions or any greedy bullshit unlike Take-Two, EA or Bethesda.

Reception
When the game first launched, it got several negative criticism about the game's very poor quality, IGN gave a score of 2/10 (Painful), Angry Joe gave a score of 1/10 and EPIC FAIL award, while the overall MetaCritic score, the game has the aggregate score of 1.4 from reviewers and 0.9 from users.

There were so many negative criticism, it became a candidate for the worst games of all-time on Wikipedia.

Trivia

 * According to AlvaroNovaes-BR, during the development of this game, the headquarters were a massive mess, he had a crunch of making this entire page until 4:00 AM (BRT).
 * AlvaroNovaes-BR claimed that he hated the making of this game, when he's still developing his games for nearly 7 years!