Rezerwowe Psy

Rezerwowe Psy(Eng:Reservoir Dogs) is a turn-based strategy game produced by Nekrosoft and published by IPS Computer Group SP. zoo. October 25, 1999 only in Poland, surprisingly, it was planned to release the game outside of Poland, but it never happened. The game caused a lot of controversy in Poland thanks to its offensive and vulgar nature.

Why It Sucks

 * 1) The front cover of the game box looks incredibly lazy, it's just a wooden box with an attached chain and painted inscriptions lying on the table.
 * 2) The game was actually created only to profit from controversy, which makes it extremely offensive and vulgar and also includes erotic scenes. Actually the game offends absolutely every minority it falls on, for example the game in a racist way shows blacks literally as a wilderness running with bananas. As a result of its aggressive nature, there has been controversy across the country.
 * 3) * The game also offends one of the most popular anime series, and more precisely, it's Sailor Moon.
 * 4) The game is full of references to Nazism like the swastika of the Third Reich, and the game says that the gang that player controls is on the far-right side, and there are also a lot of anti-Semitic pseudo-values.
 * 5) The game has a lot of unfunny humor, which is related to, for example, sex, and sometimes the jokes are downright offensive, mainly related to politics.
 * 6) The game is a rip-off of UFO: Enemy Unknown, released 6 years earlier, resulting in clunky and outdated game mechanics, resulting in frustrating gameplay.
 * 7) The intro overall looks poor and cheap, even by 1999 standards.
 * 8) Although the menu is not poor, it is quite put off, mainly because of vulgar names of choices instead of standard ones and also options are called "Opcyje" instead of "Opcje"(Eng:Options), which is a misspelling.
 * 9) The graphics, although not terrible, quite backward and not eye-catching, the background appearance is on par with that of Postal I released 2 years ago, sprites and 3D models are quite low quality, especially visible in text cutscenes, and the animations are stiff.
 * 10) In fact, the only goal of the game of shooting innocent civilians who are not able to attack the player and the policemen who are the only ones who can shoot, the gameplay is generally boring, schematic and repetitive similar to the Prawo Krwi.
 * 11) Voice acting is poor, with a lot of poorly written dialogue.
 * 12) Billboards with strange lyrics appear in the game very often, such as CHŁODNO, GŁODNO, (censored). Lewy Sojuz Demokratyczny.(Eng:COOL, HUNGER, (censored). Left Democratic Soyuz.) where the awful grammar is literally on par with YOU'RE WINNER from Big Rigs.
 * 13) The game runs at a very slow pace, very often at just a few frames per second, if not even one frame per second, regardless of how powerful the hardware is.
 * 14) Similarly to Aliens: A Comic Book Adventure, the game makes you change discs from one disc to another, but here it is even worse, because you have to change more than once or several times, and sometimes the game does not even see the disc after the change.
 * 15) The last level is almost impossible to beat, mainly due to the fact that the game suffers from a lot of glitches, as well as a significant advantage of the enemy over the player.
 * 16) The soundtrack is poor mainly trying to imitate rock and the sound effects are loud.

The Only Redeeming Quality

 * 1) Although the soundtrack is poor, some songs may be catchy to the ear.

Trivia

 * The publisher of the game, IPS Computer Group, distributed quite a lot of well-known and even good games in Poland, such as: Dungeon Keeper, SimCity 2000, Syndicate, Ultima VII, Eye of the Beholder III, Lands of Lore, Command & Conquer: Tiberian Sun, Screamer 2, Warhammer : Dark Omen, mh:awesomegames:Strike Commander, World Cup 98 or UFO: Enemy Unknown / X-COM: Terror from the Deep which the game was a rip off. They also distributed the game Streets of SimCity in Poland. The full list is available here.

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