Blog:What would AVGN rather do?

If AVGN played/finished one of these games... what would he rather do? Mighty No. 9=I'd rather have a stingray go mighty No. 2 straight into my nostrils while sitting under a rain of shit than play this unholy amalgamation of ass-slime and dick-liquid! Anthem=I'd rather create 3 clones of myself and do the Human Centipede thing with my fucking clones. I call it the Anthem of Shit, and it's certainly better than this fucking game! Balan Wonderworld=I'd rather wear a stinky raccoon costume, walk out into the wild and have sɘχ with female raccoons than embarrass myself more by playing Balan Wonderworld. End of story — Balan Wonderfuck sucks dick. Bomberman: Act Zero=I'd rather chop off my fucking dick and my ass and feed the jackals with them than waste more of my precious time playing a broken piece of Stegosaurus' colossal turd that called itself a Bomberman game! Metroid: Other M=I'd rather drink a gallon of Ridley's fresh diarrhea while having a Chozo peck my fucking ass than suffer this unholy creation that mh:awesomegames:Nintendo christened it "Metroid: Other M"! This game is literally shit — and one of the few instances where Nintendo accidentally gave us shit and not gold. What do you think of these "made-up" AVGN rants?

And also, if you have a bad game that needs to be featured in this blog, feel free to let me know.